Melodrama of a Computer Virus Battle

Once upon a time, in Computerland (also known as Simon) the system administrator, Staci, logged on to do homework, only to discover that a battle was in progress. Vista Internet Security thought it funny to invade the lovely Computerland and ravage the country side with spam about viruses and protection, and making it all unpleasant to live in...and getting worse by the second.

This meant war.

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Alright men, what's going on? What's the situation?

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A computer virus!! How the hell did that get past General McAfee?

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A disguise you say? One masking itself as a legitimate computer virus scan software? The bastards! We'll soon take care of the nuisances! To arms, men! To the Internet!

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WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY'VE CAPTURED THE INTERNET??? They've now taken out our main virus defense and our backup plan...

RETREAT!!!

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Alright men, we're now locked down into safe mode. The enemy is surrounding us, finding us even here. You can hear the evil pop-ups promising virus protection...But they have backed off the Internet. Time to download some reinforcements...

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THE REINFORCEMENTS HAVE BEEN SABOTAGED??? THEY WON'T WORK PROPERLY??? CRAP!!! Backup number two...um...More reinforcements!

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...Ok, here's our situation. Every passing moment the battlefield becomes more congested. Reinforcements have arrived...but they're kind of being prisses and not starting up. Want to say our prayers now?

OF COURSE NOT! We will prevail! Quick! To the System Restore Time Machine!

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I don't care if time machines are real or not, just roll with it!

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Here we are, two days in the past. It was a long and arduous journey, but the enemy is nowhere in sight. We must hurry to send for our backup backup reinforcements before the enemy comes again. Maybe this time they actually WORK.

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Hurray! They worked! Captain Malwarebyte's army is scanning the perimeter as we speak. They've captured 38 of the enemy so far.

What do we do with them, you ask? Why, we remove them and send them into the black nothingness that is...well, I really don't know what it is, but they aren't coming back. Least lets hope not.

McAfee is SO getting a good talking to for this. I'm thinking probation, suspension, removal from office. AHA! Removal from office!!! That's IT!!

Bring in Captain Kaspersky, I need to have a word with him about a promotion...